The Days of wine and Roses

      I can’t say about the wine, but it certainly is the day (or maybe the year) for roses.

     I have never planted a rose.  They are not my favorite flower.  “A thorn with every rose,” the saying goes.  In my experience, there are dozens of thorns for every rose.  Try to do a rose bush a favor by removing some of the weeds around it.  You will be rewarded with scratches a-plenty.

     All my roses are  inherited.  A former owner of the Loveland house must have loved roses.  In our small yard are nearly 20 rose bushes.

     Two years ago, I thought it a shame that the riot of roses in the backyard was appreciated by nearly no one.  In the front yard, on the sunny side of the garage were some vines that clambered near to the garage eaves every summer.  Since they didn’t bloom in the first or second year we lived here, I decided they should go and I would thin the backyard roses by transplanting three of the biggest rose bushes to the front yard on the sunny side of the garage.

     I dugout the existing garage plants.  I made big holes for the new residents.  Somewhere in a tree-planting catalog, I read that you should dig a $100 hole for a $10 tree.  I thought that should work for roses, too.

      Digging up the roses was more difficult, since I needed to preserve as much of the root ball as possible.  And, of course, there were the thorns to deal with.  I got the job done.  I wondered if the bushes would grow at all after the shock they had been through.

     They did grow, and pretty well, too.  But nary a bloom did they produce the first year.  I was calling on a neuro-kinesiologist who was also a rose-raiser.  She said they might never bloom, probably because I hadn’t taken enough of the root ball.

    I stuck with them for another year.  They put out a few blooms low, then gave it up.  But the vines grew six feet or higher.  So I gave them another chance.  This year, they produced.

      Speaking of weird plants, take a look at this asparagus stalk:

     It started out as Siamese twin shoots.  Coming through the soil, it looked like a double barrel shotgun barrel.  I refrained from cutting it.  It grew big.  What will it be like a year from now?

      Asparagus season is over for this year.   I guess I will have to learn how to trim roses whose blooms have faded and fallen.

      Maybe I’ll check out the wine, first.   

Irish Blessing

      “May the road rise to meet you, may the wind be always at your back.”

      So begins an “Irish Blessing”.  There are four or five versions floating around the barbershop world.       

      It may be an Irish blessing, but it most certainly is NOT a combine driver’s prayer, or a tractor driver’s, either.  Like many things in the world, the words mean well, but really have the opposite effect.  I can see if you were taking a journey on foot or perhaps by bicycle, a tailwind would be a good thing.  (OK, airplane fliers like tailwinds, too.)

      I’ve sung the song a few times, so can’t really complain if my prayer gets answered.  I set out this week to work the summer fallow, which is yielding lots of volunteer millet.  I would destroy the crop which a year ago was a cash crop, but now is a crop of weeds.

      The theory and practice of good tillage dictates that you work a field in a direction different from the preceding operation.  Other considerations for what direction to work include consideration of conservation, preventing erosion from water and wind.  Taking all the forgoing considerations into account, I decide at the beginning of an operation which direction to head tractor and plow.

      It seems no matter which direction I lay out the land, the wind finds me out, and answers the prayer, at least half the time.  That is to say, no matter which way I go, the wind will follow me. 

      Ideally, I would have a wind blowing at a right angle to my tractor’s direction of travel.  So if the wind is blowing out of the southwest, I lay out the field so the tractor is heading northwest half the time and southeast the other half.  Perfect, the wind is at right angles to the directions of travel.

      Except, that after an hour or two, the wind dies down, and then comes up a little later out of a different direction—either from the southeast or the northwest.  Then, half the time I have a clean ride with the wind in my face, the other half, I am covered in the dust kicked up by the implement’s interface with the soil.  

     The combine driver has the same dilemma.  A tailwind brings not only dust but also chaff and beards that hunker down in the shirt collar or wherever elastic goes, such as underwear band.  Not pleasant.

     Of course, with modern-day equipment, cabs, air conditioners, and the like, it’s not much of a problem.  I do have a tractor with a cab, but no air conditioner.  It spent last week waiting for clutch parts.  I wanted to get the summer fallow done.  I didn’t take the few hours it will take to install the clutch on the cab tractor.  

     Instead, I took the 820 out, no cab, let alone air conditioner.  Last time I worked the field, I went northeast by southwest.  The wind blew an inordinately long time out of the northeast.        

      This time, I went southeast by northwest.  The wind blew predominately out of the southeast.  I put on lots of sunscreen, without cab or umbrella to protect me from solar rays.  When I came in at noon or at the end of the day, a glance in the mirror revealed a character who spent too much time in the makeup artist’s chair, who had gotten the pancake flour mixed up with the dust, and the grease paint applied plentifully on the nose where I pushed up my glasses several times a day with greasy finger.  After a shampoo in the shower, I had to scrape mud off the shower floor.    

     How does the wind know?  Perhaps I should change the words when I sing “Irish Blessing”.  “May the wind be always at your side.”  Doesn’t have the same ring.  Maybe quit singing it altogether.  Or just give in to the inevitable.

May the road rise to meet you,

May the wind be always at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon your face,

May the rain fall soft upon your fields,

And until we meet again, may He hold you in His hand,

May god hold you in the palm of His hand.

   

Ah, Hail

                   “Then April cried and stepped aside, and along came pretty little May.”

     This year, the merry month of May brought relief from April’s winds (March had given up its place as windiest?) and wildfire danger, over 2” of moisture mostly in the form of rain, and a hailstorm.

     The storm left .61” in the gauge.  Not sure that included melting ice.  It did modest crop damage, the full extent yet to be determined. The buildings suffered some dmage.  No glass got broken.  The roofs suffered only minor “cosmetic damage” according to the adjuster.

      Plastic took a hit. 

     Some of the house siding is 40 years old.  Some of it is newer, having been replaced after earlier hail episodes.  The newer stuff has smaller laps, 5” compared to the older 8”.  The oldest siding is on the south and east, where hail apparently never hits.

    The newest is on the north side of the house, which has been replaced twice since the original job.  The 8” stuff on the north got replaced some years ago.  Within a year or two of that replacement, a second storm nailed the north side.  The siding manufacturer replaced the replacement under warranty.  I doubt they’ll do it again.  It was nearly 20 years ago.    

    This week, the house adjuster was here, measured, noted, and left.  I should hear from him soon.

    The wheat is another matter.  The biggest damage was to leaves that canopy and shelter the rows so that other plants—weeds—don’t start growing between rows.  It could be a weedy harvest.  Can’t spray for weeds without losing organic status.

     The final evaluation on wheat won’t come until harvest.  The formula will compare what should have been with what actually happens as far as yield.  

      As always, Mother Nature showered us with a mixed blessing, the needed moisture along with the damage caused by hail.  Musn’t complain.  I remember a May (2001) when it was so dry not even the dandelions could grow.  

    

Sleep Apnea

     Some years ago, I thought I might have sleep apnea. Brother John had been diagnosed with the condition and I shared a symptom—awakening suddenly, gasping for breath, having the feeling that I was suffocating, feeling like I had run a hundred-yard dash.

     Having reached my deductible with the insurance company, and having some funds left in my cafeteria plan (use it or lose it), I signed up for a visit to a sleep lab.  On the appointed day (or night), I drove to Hays. 

      I found some place to eat, but they didn’t serve liquor.  I ate without my usual beer.

      I pulled into the parking lot where the sleep lab was located.  A younger fellow with a ball of clothes in hand entered the building just ahead of me.  I grabbed my small bag and followed him.

       The place was a hybrid hospital-motel.  There was a front desk with a windowed office behind it.  One of the two young male attendants showed me to a room with a bed, nightstand, and a bathroom adjacent.  The bed’s headboard had a call button dangling from it.

       Instructed to try to go through my nightly ritual as close as I could, I showered and grabbed a book. I think I should have had that beer.  One of the questions they asked during the prep, was had I had any alcoholic beverage to drink.

      It was a bit early, about 9 p.m., when both guys came in with a fistful of wires, it looked like.  They put adhesive patches here and there.  One wire was glued right in front of my right nostril.  That wire and a few others were held in place by a headband.

     All those wires went into two bundles that were plugged into two receptors which led to some kind of machine under the nightstand.  Now, try to go to sleep.

      I didn’t go right to sleep.  I could hear loud snoring coming from another room, probably the young fellow who led the way in.  It went on for a while.  I could hear both guys stirring around and a conversation going on.  The snoring had stopped and didn’t start again.

       I really never went into a deep sleep.  I had to summon a guy to unplug me so I could use the bathroom sometime in the early a.m. 

      I saw the young fellow leave around 6:30 a.m.  In addition to his ball of clothes, probably dirty laundry now, he carried a small briefcase, a CPAP machine I assumed.  Then the young guys came to unwire me.

      When I asked, they told me they were college students who worked the sleep lab a few nights a week.  While the patients slept, they were free to study.  Plus they got paid to do the job.

     They informed me that I did not suffer from sleep apnea because I breathed through my nose.  Aha!  That wire in front of my nostril.

      I was a bit disappointed.  Not that I would leave without a machine.  Mainly, because self-diagnosis had been wrong.  I dressed and drove home, getting there in time to teach my afternoon classes.    

     In a follow-up, the doctor wrote me a prescription for sleep medication, but I never used it.  I have enough bad habits.  No need to add a drug-dependency.

      That was that.  Fast-forward twenty years, to when I couldn’t pass a physical to retain my Commercial Driver’s License.  (http://50farm.blogspot.com/2017/01/)   

     When I called on the doctor to address my blood pressure issue, despite my protestations, the doctor insisted I visit a sleep lab.  This time, I could stay home, sleep in my own bed.

      I had to go to a “class” where I learned how to hook up the machine, fill out preview and follow-up forms, and return everything before 9 a.m. the following day.  The machine this time was a headband with probes in each nostril and a sensor between my eyebrows.

      I slept quite normally.  Filling out the follow-up question, I was asked how many times I awoke during the night.  I wrote down four or five.  Ten days later, when I got my results, the machine recorded an average of 48 wake-ups per hour.  I had severe sleep apnea.

      I got the CPAP machine.  I have carried it to London, Germany, and Japan, anywhere that I plan to sleep.  It has made a big difference.  I have more energy.  My blood pressure is normal.

     A year or so later, the Goodwife was instructed to go to the sleep lab.  Perhaps her blood pressure problems were related to sleep apnea.

      Her “class” didn’t amount to much.  She brought home a machine.  This one clipped to her right forefinger.  No head band, no nostril probes, no patch between the eyebrows.  They have made a lot of progress in the year or so since I took the last test, not to mention the twenty years or so since I went through it the first time.

      Her test results showed “moderate” sleep apnea.  The “cure”, besides a CPAP machine, included the possibility of using a mouthpiece during sleep.  Except, this is the lady that can’t take a dental X-ray without barfing.  No mouthpiece need apply.

     She has been trying to use the CPAP for a few weeks.  It hasn’t worked out nearly as well for her as it has for me.  The problem is finding the right face mask.

      She is on her third mask style.  She started with “nostril pillows” that plug into the nose and are held in place with a headband.  The current mask has worked best, a modified nostril pillow.  The pulmonologist-lady says we will keep advancing until we find the right fit, perhaps a full mask that covers both nose and mouth.

      Whereas I average six to eight hours per night with my machine (it gives you all the statistics when you turn it off in the morning, including number of “events”—wake-ups—per hour), so far the Goodwife averages about five hours per night.  Her blood pressure is down, however, but she still takes blood pressure pills.

      Now, the nightly ritual includes both of us donning headgear and pushing the button on the machine.  It makes for a rather entangling goodnight kiss.    

     Thankfully, one great stride in the evolution of the CPAP includes nearly silent machines.      

        

      

   

    

R Project continued

      The last time the R ran was sometime in 1986 or ’87.  I was planting wheat with another tractor.  I noticed some little grass shoots coming up in the fine dirt prepared for planting.  Thinking it might be volunteer wheat (that would be ok), but fearing it could be jointed goat grass, I stopped the tractor and investigated.  It was goat grass coming up.

     Can’t have that.  So I shut down the 820 or 830 and started up the R.  I hooked it to the rod weeder and went after the goat grass. 

      Things went well for a short while.  Then the R started losing power, and began having a series of explosions where flames jumped out of the exhaust pipe.  Soon it was running on only one (of two) cylinders. 

      It was growing dark, so the explosive flames emanating from the muffler were quite colorful.  But not funny.  I unhitched the rod and limped the R back to the farmyard.  It managed to back itself into the red barn, far in the corner, where it stayed for the next 30 or so years.     http://50farm.blogspot.com/2017/11/

      Many a time I wished it were operational.  With the right combination of social schedule, weather, and good luck, I may get it off the unemployed roll.  Here it is in its homeless state of uncleanliness.

      Slowly, it sheds its parts:

     One of the hardest jobs was removing the studs that hold the exhaust/water pipes and the air intake fitting to the top of the head. Having removed the nuts retaining the pipes, it was necessary to take the studs out of the head, too.  I double nutted it, but couldn’t get the nuts tight enough to turn the stud in the head.  Add the vice grip, or adjustable locking pliers, in case you object to using a brand name for a generic tool.

     The outside ports are exhaust ports.  The next two are water jacket ports (notice the rust).  The middle one is the air intake port.  The outside ports lead to the exhaust valves.  The inside port leads to the intake valves.  The water ports connect directly to the radiator.    

      Altogether, there are 12 studs to remove in the top of the head.  All went well until number eleven came up.  Woops!

  

      “Don’t know my own strength!” to quote Bullwinkle.  Note the twisted-off stud.  I wasn’t able to do a selfie of my right arm between elbow and shoulder after the stud twisted off and my arm connected with the radiator cowling.  I was wearing a long sleeve shirt, a heavy over shirt, a hoodie, and coveralls.  Blood soaked the sleeve of my long sleeved shirt.  I wasn’t aware of the extent of the damage until the “nooning” when I removed the outer layer of clothing.  I did feel my pain, however.  It helped not to look at it.

     More studs to come, but first, off came the tappet cover.

  

     Then the rocker arms and fuel injector lines.

    Then the fuel injector pump cover.  Actually, the pump cover had to come off to get the fuel lines disconnected.

     Inside the pump compartment are four nuts connected to, you guessed it, four studs.  The nuts have to come off to get the head off.  In addition to the four nuts in the pump compartment, ten ¾” nuts hold the head to the block.  (Studs again, but they don’t have to come off.)  They should be torqued to 208-foot pounds.  This isn’t a job for the weak, as they say.  I got in plenty of upper body exercise on this day.

      Another day, another strenuous task.  The chain hoist hung on the east wall (can be seen in the background of the second picture above).  It had to be lifted up and hooked to the cross bar overhead.  I don’t remember it being such a hard job in days of old.  Or maybe it isn’t the days that are old.

    I had to remove the lower water pipes, connected to the head with four more studs.  I felt like I had in a day’s work by the time I got to this stage.

    Note the left valve, which is the exhaust valve for the left or number one cylinder.  The little “eclipse” mark at about 2 o’clock is where the flames were coming from that came out the exhaust pipe.  The valve is badly burned.  Why did it fail?  Valve springs too weak?  Tappets set too tight, so the valve never fully closed?

     Well, it won’t run that way.  Eight more studs to remove, the four that go into the pump compartment, and four holding the lower water pipes.  The four going into the pump compartment spend their life in the oil, so come out fairly easily.  The water pipe ones get rusty and stubborn.  Another twist-off.  This time, I didn’t injure myself.

      On a rainy day, the head went to Duerst Machine in Burlington.  I pointed out the two twisted-off studs.  “Yeah,” both guys said, and shrugged.  Must happen all the time.

       Next step, see if parts are available.  They are, at a healthy price.  Do I install new piston rings while I’m this close?  I have to remove the starting engine to get to the rod bearings.  If I don’t change rings and it uses oil and doesn’t have good compression, I have to go through the whole remove-the-head thing again.

     A set of rings (there are 14 of them, seven per piston) cost $300+.  A gasket set cost $200+.  One of the twisted-off studs costs $13.  The water pipe stud is only 7/16” and costs only $11.  Of course, they are all painted green for that bargain price.  Well, maybe nothing in this order is painted green, but they are green by association.  I mustn’t complain.  I can still get new parts for a sixty-year-old machine.

      The R gets a rest (as if it hasn’t had enough of one) while I get back to my social schedule.  The quartet sang two songs (national anthem, and America) at a Rotary convention in Estes Park.  Our lead is a Rotarian.  It was a long way to drive to sing two songs.  We had to go through Longmont because 34 is closed for flood repairs—for the second year.

“R” Project--Maybe

     “H-e-e-e-re we go again . . . .”  (Think Ray Charles.)

     Last fall, I reorganized the red barn’s contents so that I could work on a tractor last used in 1981 or ’82, the John Deere Model R.   http://50farm.blogspot.com/2017/11/

      I had three mechanical projects to get done this spring:  Stop an oil leak on the Ford tractor rear end, get the Dodge truck brakes fixed, and get started on the “R”.  Thanks to inclement weather, the Ford tractor got fixed first.  During a pretend mini-blizzard two or three weeks ago, I moved the Ford from its hibernation spot in the combine shed to the shop. 

      The shop has some insulation provided by lath and plaster on ceiling and walls.  Well, some plaster on the ceiling.  It has a tendency to fall off here and there.  The shop also has a big wood-coal stove that does a fairly good job of warming things enough to make mechanicing bearable in cold weather.

      Fixing the Ford required draining the oil from the rear end, removing the PTO shaft, and fishing around with a long-handled socket to find a one-inch nut.  The right one is barely visible through the opening left vacant by the PTO removal.  The left one is obscured by the large differential gear. 

      The nut is on a short shaft that also has a very accessible nut on the outside of the tractor.  The shaft provides the pivot anchor for the three-point hitch arm.  The shaft passes through a plate that serves to hold the oil in and the dirt out of the differential case. 

      When the nuts loosen, the plate comes away from the case and oil drips out.  The key is to loosen the nut up on the inside of the case enough to get the plate away from the case, without taking the nut off the shaft inside the tractor.  It would be nearly impossible to start the nut back onto the shaft without removing the left axle housing, a big job.

      Once the plate is away a half an inch or so, I could clean both surfaces, apply a healthy dose of silicone gasket-maker, and snug the nut enough to make the silicone bulge out all over.  That was one day’s work, getting the tractor moved and all.

     The next day, after the silicone had a chance to set, I put a hundred pounds of torque on the shaft nuts.  I refrained from adding oil for another day or two to give the silicone a chance to set up completely.  I hope it won’t leak again.

        The Ford had one other problem.  The starter “button” doesn’t work.  I have to short across the starter relay terminals to engage the starter.  The starter linkage has a safety feature that won’t allow the button to depress if the machine is in gear.  I should get the thing fixed.

      An internet search provided only used buttons, nothing new or rebuilt.  They looked pretty rusty, and pricey.  A little JB Weld to the rescue. 

      A washer is supposed to stay in a slot in the shaft of the starter button.  The washer contacts a wishbone-like lever which rocks down and forces another rod into another button on the starter relay.  The washer and slot on the starter button shaft is worn enough that the washer slips instead of forcing the wishbone lever down.  I glued the washer to the slot in the shaft.  It works, at least for now.

     Nice weather this week provided a window to work on the Dodge.  Having consulted U-Tube, I was ready to perform diagnostic procedures on the truck.  Protocol calls for stepping on the brake a few times with the engine off, to get all the vacuum out of the brake booster, which amplifies your leg muscle when you step on the brake.

      The first problem is to get the truck to start after its winter layover.  I spilled air-cleaner oil all over the engine top while looking down the carburetor throat to see if there was gas going into the carburetor.  I flooded the thing.  It dried out pretty well while I mopped up the spilled oil.  It started right up on the second attempt.

      The brakes had not healed themselves over the winter, so I followed the protocol.  With the engine off, I pumped the brake and held it down.  With the brake pedal held down, I started the engine.  If the vacuum boost is working correctly, the pedal should go down another two or three inches when the booster does its job correctly.

       Instead of going down, the pedal kicked back, like when you fire a gun and it kicks back.  Conclusion:  brake booster is faulty.  It seems to have rebelled.  It’s doing just the opposite of what it is supposed to be doing.

       I replaced the hydro-vac a few years ago.  Few?  Maybe ten years?  Maybe more?  That time, the brakes wouldn’t release.  I had to plug the vacuum line in order to move.  Then I had strictly mechanical brakes.  Now, I have mechanical brakes minus the brake booster working against me.

      It was a nice day, not a breath of air stirring, a very rare occurrence on the high plains.  The grass is young and tender.  It eases the job of rolling around under the truck.

      Removing the booster calls for removing three bolts, disconnecting two vacuum lines and two brake fluid lines.  I also had to remove the PTO shaft that runs the hoist so the booster could get out of its “compartment”.  No problem, except for the fluid lines, which drip fluid all over me as I lay under it. 

      I managed to get everything undone and the lines all plugged.  The booster came right out—and knocked over the jar I had used to catch the dripping fluid.

       Next problem, finding the brake-booster for a 1969 Dodge truck.  I loaded up the booster and headed for town.  NAPA didn’t have one in their system, but they may have found one through some other outfit.  Of course, it has to come from Chicago or somewhere.  I will pay freight plus the usual exorbitant fee for obsolete parts.  It may ship before the weekend.  If so, it will be available Monday or Tuesday.

     Clouds appeared and a few raindrops hit the windshield as I returned from the town trip.  There are twenty or so bushels of wheat still on the truck, left over from last fall’s seeding operation.  I had to move it back into the shed.  Can’t leave it outside for a week.  Just remember, no brakes at all, now.

      The emergency brake on this truck clamps down on the drive shaft rather than using the rear brakes.  I could rely on it.  Fortunately, I was able to get the old feller back into the shed without using any brakes.

      Well, I guess I’ll get to the “R” sometime.  Actually, I did get started on that project.  I hate to leave you in suspense, but stay tuned.  I’ll get around to it someday.       

Defence

     “Something there is that doesn’t love [barbwire]”to paraphrase Robert Frost. 

     The fence went up in something like 2010 in order to graze the CRP grass prior to breaking it out for farming purposes.  It also served to carry current from the farmyard to the fence a half-mile east, for the same purpose of grazing CRP grass.

     I removed all of the other fences as I began tilling the two plots.  For some reason, I left that fence.  I was probably thinking I might want to graze the east piece again someday, because it did have a good stand of clover.  I could use the remaining fence line to carry electricity again.

      I haven’t grazed anything for five or six years.  So last spring I began taking down that fence.  Initially, I used some of the posts to fence around some blue spruce that the deer were abusing.

     The fence became an annoyance.  It threw itself into the way of various and sundry plows.  Even a pickup mirror struck a fence post.  Just to name two things that didn’t love “a wall.”  Plus, grass and weeds find a solace on either side of the wire where neither plow nor mower can touch it.

      Time to “defence”.  The weather granted me a one-day window of opportunity this week.  It was a bit windy but warm enough to work outside comfortably.  (The window closed quickly--see above photo.)

      The real work was rolling up the wire.  They make machines to handle that chore, but I didn’t have one at hand.  So, roll it up the old-fashioned way.

      The handy-dandy post puller makes uprooting the steel posts a piece of cake.  The hardest part of post-pulling is carrying the post-puller from post to post.

  

     Then the posts have to be picked up and stowed.  Harness the 4X4.  It doesn’t respond to voice command, like a horse might.  You have to get in, drive a few yards, get out and pick up a post.  It doesn’t have to be fed on a daily basis, however.

      There was a nice neat stack, teepee style, of posts and wire from the removal of the other fences.  Something (the wind, no doubt) didn’t love that neat stack.  It went down into a heap.

       An hour got things neatened up a bit.

       It took two or three days to build that fence.  Driving a post is a lot of work and takes time.  It took less than six hours to remove the fence.